First off, the last post was written at a very emotional and devastating time. I apologize for all bad grammar and spelling errors.
Since her passing, it's been difficult to an extent. We never thought we'd be losing one of our pack this year, let alone it being Duchess.
The worst part of all this? When we've shared the news, everyone hears us say Duchess, but their minds go to Athena. We have to correct them. Only then do some get why this hit us so flipping hard.
We miss her. Miss her terribly. We never realized just how much energy she brought to this house & family.
This post has taken me nearly 3 weeks to compose. So many mixed emotions and so much going on.
Tomorrow marks a month since we said 'goodbye'. We do miss her incredibly. You don't realize just how much they are ingrained into your everyday routine. I find myself reaching for her at night to give her some rubs, like I did every night while lying in bed. It's heartbreaking when I realize she isn't there.
The dogs obviously missed her at first. Apparently Peryn became rather clingy the day after while at daycare. That dog is not a cuddler or clingy.
They did go searching for her at day care and at home. They won't sleep on the dog bed that she seemed to have claimed.
Other than that I didn't think there was any other signs that they missed her---until I really thought about 1 new thing that Peryn has been doing.
In our new home we use the basement as their play area. SO for months we'd go downstairs with the pups and let them go wild with their herding ball. I even began putting Athena in her cart to let her run around with them.
Oftentimes Duchess would come downstairs and beg for some petting while looking at the dogs like they were idiots. She never wanted any part in that, but she did like to hang out next to me when I was sitting down there watching.
Within the past few weeks, Peryn has been spending a lot of time down there alone. He'll either play with the big ball himself or....since I can't see down there I don't know. He waits for someone- whether it be Lada, Rich, myself, or anyone else to join him while he plays. If no one comes down, he will be down there for hours.
This started after Duchess was gone. I couldn't figure out any connection. Yesterday it dawned on me. After dinner (or day care), Duchess would curl up on the couch and sleep. Peryn was often by her side. If she was on the couch-- so was she. If she was on her bed in front of the fire, so was he. They were pretty close.
When I took Lada on visits to Tenn, Peryn & Duchess would play with one another.
Whenever they went outside, he always waited for her to come back in before he would. He kept an eye on her.
Now with her gone, he doesn't have anyone to sleep with or watch out for. He always keeps an eye on Lada, but Duchess was more an equal of sorts. Without her lying down and sleeping--he now goes to the basement.
With Mom visiting, she worries about him and will go down to check on him or watch him play. I just let him be.....
We don't want any security cameras inside the house, but are considering getting one for the basement (as it's just storage and our dogs). This way we can keep an eye on him while he's down there. He does have the ability to come up and down as he pleases, he just chooses not to do so.
My friends have been absolutely wonderful. The outpouring of love we've received after her passing has been so touching. SO many people loved her and it warms me knowing others will miss her as well.
SO that's been our new normal since she left us.
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